“What if we die and it turns out God is a big chicken”

A moment later, just a hundredth or thousandth fraction of second later, I saw light again. It was bright. I couldn’t open my eyes completely at first. But when I did, I realized I was lying on my back and staring at the sky. Smooth and serene sky. Cloudless.

Wind was rushing by.. but it was wrong! It was blowing from behind my back. Upwards. Isn’t that against the laws of physics? I can’t remember the specific law guiding the air movement. I am pretty sure I have read something about that. But that is trivial right now. What exactly was happening? Wait a second! Am I falling? Am I? I am! How…?

I was falling. I didn’t even realize it. It didn’t feel like falling. Nothing like I imagined falling would be like – fast, world going bizzare, and once gravity was done with me I would hit the ground and everything would go absolutely still.. all over within a few seconds. But it was nothing like that. It was slow. And peaceful. I still waited to feel the ground. Ten seconds.. Twenty.. A minute.. Nothing. I couldn’t feel even a light thud. And its been a while like this.

How long have I been falling for? I stopped trying to keep track of time after around an hour.. But it must have been a few hours at least. Whats wrong?! I tried standing on my feet. But I could not keep my feet anywhere. Gravity was weird. I tried looking around. It was just vast expanse of spotless white sky. There was no ground anywhere in sight either.

Its been ages. Literally. Why am I not reaching the ground. Has Earth disappeared? Am I in space? But that should be dark.. not like the white sky I was looking at.

Am I dreaming? Doesn’t feel like dreaming. And I hardly dream when I sleep. Or.. I can be in coma.. But I don’t remember meeting an accident or anything. Actually I don’t remember exactly what I was doing before I started falling. I have been falling for a really long time.

Am I… dead?

Is this what being dead feels like? I feel no pain. I can feel nothing. Just a slight touch of cool wind passing by. But not chilly cold. Pleasantly cool.

How did I die? I don’t remember.. Infact.. who am I? What was my name?! I have no memory of anything! I do know how nature works. I remember I know about many things of this world. But I do not know any thing specific about myself. I can’t even remember how I looked like!

I was finally feeling something. Panic.

This is no hell or heaven. Where are the other people who have been dead? I never gave much thought to what would after-life be like. But from all that I heard in my short (or was it long?) life time I never imagined it would be like this. No one to judge your life deeds. No gates of heaven or hell. No angels. No burning fires. No God..

All you had to do was to keep falling in a bottomless abyss and stare at bright white sky. Cluelessly.

And the panic went away. I am just glad there is no pain now.

What a waste of life I lived..

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~ by hakunamatatawithgarima on May 24, 2011.